Depth

hmm... I think I'm beginning to make a habit of this. And as my other habits include drinking too much, falling over, saying very inappropriate things, picking my nose and always always being the one to take the joke too far and send every one's faces a sickly green colour that would put Shrek to shame, I'm thinking that this could be a good habit. This could be a constructive habit..
I kind of glanced over the word vomit I've spurted out in my entries on Rusted Gumption (I'm still in lurrvvvee with that name) and realised that this blog hasn't really served much more of a purpose for me then a punching bag.
So now, I'll try and seem happy and nice and not angry or bitchy while I make an entry that delves a bit deeper... into me. I'm not really sure where to start though so I'm taking other blogger's brief summing ups of themselves as inspiration.

Ahh ok, I guess I could start with the physical aspect of myself.
I'm a brunette, but my hair seems to be increasingly growing lighter, becoming redder with streaks from the sun. My hair is long and I haven't been to a hairdressers' in over 2 years because I've told myself I can do just as good a job as any of them (plus I'm a major tight arse), going for the wild bunyip look that has just swaggered out of the billabong, which is achieved by never brushing it, by applying a shit load of hairspray and hair pins to the nest when I hit the town. So successful is my styling towards the wild animal look I've woken up in many a backyard in the early morning with birds making themselves at home in it.
I get told that it looks 'sexy' though, which always makes me laugh, partly because I have the maturity of a 10 year old and partly because the people telling me that always seem to have to give into the urge of nuzzling their snouts into my wild hair when telling me this.

I'm of average height for a girl my age, around 5"9 with a 'healthy' figure. I'm not fat, nor am I thin, I get called 'lean' too, but everybody seems to have a different opinion on my body type as i guess it's kind of a rarity amongst these city folks who don't come from a long line of Western District hay carters and farmers as they ask me whether I'm a good swimmer. I'm an excellent swimmer, but that's not just because of my broad shoulders, long arms or strong upper arms (for a girl anyway- don't get mental images of a female Rock).

I'm pretty strong for a chick after growing up on a farm and doing hard psychical labour most of my life, but I still always get my arse kicked in a fight with my brother, unless I have a pillow handy to fling at his eye and break a blood vessel or two (true story- wasn't on purpose).

I've gotta say though I'm pretty happy with my tits and legs. My stomach seems to have a mind of its own majority of the time, but my tits- well they ain't too big or too small, Goldie Locks says they are jjjjjuuuusstttt right (don't take that as a lesbian insinuation).

On occasion I get told that I'm beautiful; I don't really believe people when they say that though because I have an appearance complex thanks to every fucker I ever met and ever knew calling me everything that was a synonym of bush pig between the ages of 10 and 17. Now, at 19 I'm told that I'm attractive (often by the same people who called me ugly once) and I just want to tell them to go suck my dick- if i had one.

As for me.... beneath the vanity that has taken over my self perception due to my fucking appearance; well I've been described as alot of things- black horse, different, unique, unusual, adventurous, freak, witty, eccentric, crazy, loose cannon, flirt, independent, dreamer, flighty, trustworthy, helpful, deep, complex, withdrawn, confident, ratbag, lazy, determined, loud, quiet, reckless, rash, quick, imaginative, intelligent, stupid, odd, queer, charismatic, energetic, spontaneous, unpredictable, ugly, sad, funny, etc.
Funny how alot of those words contradict each other isn't it?